26 Comments

surely this isn't the first "what if Santa was badass" movie Hollywood has pushed into market, right? feels like Gerard Butler would have made this 12 years ago.

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There was one with David Harbour, "Violent Night", just a year or two ago.

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Maybe they can incorporate the existence of NORAD’s Santa Tracker into a film. It can be played straight by some paranoid adults who believe it is real, and somehow believe they have access to people at NORAD and that what is termed as Santa is actually a threat. This could be a low budget movie, since it’s really about the self-perpetuating torture among the group of people. With good writing and strong adherence to the subject, and non-mainstream goals, this could be something, perhaps.

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There's the Finnish film RARE EXPORTS and it's pretty awful take on Santa.

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What didn't you like about it? I kinda liked this even though it's slight

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I expressed myself badly. I liked the movie, I meant that Santa is portrayed as a terrible monster in it.

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I never lowered myself to watching it, but let's acknowledge the 1996 Hulk Hogan movie "Santa With Muscles".

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founding

Remember when Jake Kasdan made films like Zero Effect? A few bright spots since then but geez.

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Holy hell, I hadn't even realized that was him. Walk Hard, too!

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Get out of here, Callum Drift! You don't want no part of this shit.

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"His insistence on grief, always on his terms, can come off as bullying and narcissistic" is something I've been personally wrestling with this week and you put it into words. That's very helpful.

For Red One: I know we're not in the best time for suffering consequences of your actions, but surely the combination of "Callum Drift" and the kid's recital trope is punishable some way. At least community service.

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"How do you keep the kids content with flying sleds once they’ve seen Deadpool carve a bloody path through a battalion of foes?"

In a world where parents let Fortnite babysit their 8 year-olds I'm sure this happens but god I hope it's not a common occurrence.

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It so is. My then 11 year old was bitter because "everyone" else had seen Deadpool but him. It might not be completely accurate, but I he can probably tell you every significant scene without having ever seen it.

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🤮

Taking my kid and moving out to where there's no internet.

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My Red One tinfoil hat theory is the random Wonder Woman joke was because some producer was adamant they hire Chris Pine or figured, in this projected November 2023 release, The Rock would be the face of DC Comics movies so why not have a cameo from Gal Gadot. Because it’s a weird joke and made twice!

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author

It’s baffling, right? Did you notice the not entirely convincing greenscreen, too? And at a certain point I found myself distracted by how seldom Evans and Johnson were in the same frame together.

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That and Kiernan Shipka not having a single scene outside of the snow globe room. She's on the sled, sure, but not with anybody else in frame.

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I was shocked when I saw how bad the trailer for The Red One was. If you can't cut a decent trailer from you action movie, you're in real trouble. If anyone is looking for a spy version of Santa watch the Prep and Landing shorts from NBC. They are a creative delight. Also funny and heartwarming.

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Everything about Red One makes me think it’s a mash-up between Arthur Christmas and The Night The Reindeer Died from Scrooged.

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Me know this far from biggest problem with movie, but "Callum Drift"? Honestly Big McLargeHuge more believable Christian name than Callum Drift.

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Nov 15Liked by Scott Tobias

I’m guessing A REAL PAIN will be too small of a release to warrant a Next Picture Show discussion, but consider this my support for a pair of episodes devoted to it and IGBY GOES DOWN as a Kieran Culkin-centric double bill.

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author

It's definitely not too small-- Fox Searchlight is putting the thing out-- but there may be a timing issue for any pairing. The end of the year is so loaded that a lot of worthwhile movies get lost in the shuffle.

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Small, passionate fanbases are cool, but I wish Igby Goes Down had wider recognition.

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That said, I’ve seen what Krampus looks like in this RED ONE and he is ridiculously buff. https://bsky.app/profile/hoodedjustice.bsky.social/post/3latwawtkzc2d

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Is there a post-credit scene where The Grinch is set up as the villain in Red One 2: Mean One?

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I thought this was a prequel to The Big Red One? Though I would pay to see Lee Marvin as the Grinch.

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